新闻 | 天津 | 民生 | 广电 | 津抖云 | 微视 | 读图 | 文娱 | 体育 | 图事 | 理论 | 志愿 | 专题 | 工作室 | 不良信息举报
教育 | 健康 | 财经 | 地产 | 天津通 | 旅游 | 时尚 | 购物 | 汽车 | IT | 亲子 | 会计 | 访谈 | 场景秀 | 发布系统

"津云"客户端
  您当前的位置 : 北方网  >  教育频道  >  留学指南  >  雅思
关键词:
 

考生必看:雅思考试大作文9分例文

http://www.enorth.com.cn  2007-06-28 17:21
 

我爱套套:90后学生热捧时尚个性安全套(组图)
教育学会会长吁停评三好 北京市教委称不会取消
团结 友谊 和平 让奥运精神在少年儿童心中延续
教育部修订教师职业道德规范:抵制有偿家教
2008年国家公务员考试热门职位一览表 迈过小三这道坎
 

  中国人写的雅思作文有结构但语言不够地道;native speaker写的文章够地道,但不够雅思!因此,市面上总找不到“完美”的雅思例文。

  此次,我特别邀请我的美国朋友(同样研究和教授雅思)“按照我的要求”写了一些文章,这里逐一贴出来,让大家分享一下。

  Children who grow up in families which are short of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children who are brought up by wealthy parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

  Some feel that the children of low income families are better equipped to deal with difficulties posed by the ‘real world’ when they grow up and they also believe the privileged children of wealthy families are less fit to deal with these difficulties . The implications and veracity of this argument seem self-evident, but in fact require closer examination. ( 58words )

  点评: 1+ 1 ’模式,最后1 句为主题句。此段的主题句稍微有点特殊,它的确否定了前面所提到的观点,从而表达出了自己的观点,此外还引出了下文。特别是最后半句: but in fact require closer examination ,感觉是在抛砖引玉。

  The popular wisdom is that children of poorer families learn early on the value of a buck, and are thus naturally better suited to stretching moneywhen times get tough in adulthood. Inversely, the children of wealthy families, thoseborn with a silver spoon in their mouths, are believed to be completely ignorant of the value of money, having had everything provided for them in their youth and oftentimes erroneously expecting the same situation in adulthood. They are believed to be prone to overspending and financial irresponsibility. This belief, though logical, overlooks one key point which is , of course, education. (100words)

  点评: 1 ’ +3模式,第1 句是主题句。请注意,从此段的内容来看,这是个让步段(即分析自己并不赞成的观点)。虽然4 段论的作文的主体段是两面讨论,但是本人还是喜欢这样的写作,即主体段的观点还是有侧重的,把让步段放在前面,最后1 句话引出下一段,这样过度地很自然,而且自己的观点也比较明确!

  The basis of this argument is , of course, knowing the value of money, and the idea that children of the poor know this, and those of the wealthy do not . Who though, is in a better position to teach their children the value of money; someone skilled in earning and keeping it, the wealthy parent, or someone who can not seem to acquire it, the poor parent? Both wealthy and poor children are equally likely to acquire an education in money, whether it is formal, or in the school of hard knocks. Conversely, both children are as likely to ignore this education. (101words)

  点评:这段的内容感觉写得不够直接,还是在分析对方观点的漏洞!请注意,前面让步段已经这么写过了,那么这一段最好是正面地论证自己的观点,这样从内容上来说更convincing一点!此外,需要说明的是,大家发现作者的内容还是有一定深度,但是这是要有一定的英语功底才行的!如果英语功底不行的话,建议内容不要写太深,因为那样容易造成考官看不懂你在说什么!

  A poor child may believe that one can get along, if not as easily, without wealth. A wealthy child may be well trained by a parent steeped in the knowledge of money management; the key to developing this skill is education.

  点评:最后一段有点像是提出解决这个问题的办法,即education.它没有像传统的结尾段那样简单的重申自己的观点。

  总结之总结:

  全文的观点有待揣摩,作者很明显是不赞成题目的说法,即Children who grow up in families which are short of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children who are brought up by wealthy parents.但是作者自己是更偏向穷人家的孩子呢,还是富人家的孩子呢?!根据文章来看,作者是中立,他所看重的是他们所接受的教育。In other words,整篇文章又是一次中立的写法。在雅思考试中,这种写法经常使用,还是非常实用的,大家可以学习一下。此外,文章中有很多好词好句,特别是长句,值得模仿一下。

稿源:无忧雅思网 编辑:赵晶
请您文明上网、理性发言并遵守相关规定,在注册后发表评论。
北方网精彩内容推荐
关闭窗口
 
| 北方网最新新闻排行 | 教育热点新闻排行 |
无标题文档
天津民生资讯
天气交通 天津福彩 每月影讯 二手市场
空气质量 天津股票 广播节目 二手房源
失物招领 股市大擂台 天视节目 每日房价
热点专题
北京奥运圣火传递和谐之旅 迎奥运 讲文明 树新风
解放思想 干事创业 科学发展 同在一方热土 共建美好家园
2008天津夏季达沃斯论坛 《今日股市观察》视频
北方网网络相声频道在线收听 2008高考招生简章 复习冲刺
天津自然博物馆馆藏精品展示 2008年天津中考问题解答
带你了解08春夏服饰流行趋势 完美塑身 舞动肚皮舞(视频)
C-NCAP碰撞试验—雪佛兰景程 特殊时期善待自己 孕期检查
热点新闻排行 财经 体育 娱乐 汽车 IT 时尚 健康 教育

Copyright (C) 2000-2019 Enorth.com.cn, Tianjin ENORTH NETNEWS Co.,LTD.All rights reserved
本网站由天津北方网版权所有
增值电信业务经营许可证编号:津B2-20000001  信息网络传播视听节目许可证号:0205099  互联网新闻信息服务许可证编号:12120170001津公网安备 12010002000001号